| Power is the ability to influence the choices of others | | | | a project you are involved in, take the file. Another |
| and to direct the attainment of goals sought by | | | | good way to gain control over information is to call IT |
| yourself and others. There are many different | | | | during lunch from your coworkers desk and pretend |
| philosophies on how to gain power in the workplace. | | | | that you are them. Disguise your voice and tell IT that |
| Thousands of books have been written on the | | | | you would like to slightly alter your email address. Do |
| subject. These books are written by people in power | | | | this with all your coworkers but only make minor |
| positions, they do not want you to really have any | | | | changes; for instance, if someone's email reads simply |
| power. These people want you to waste your time | | | | change it to this should keep your coworker from |
| trying things like "Become genuinely interested in | | | | noticing the change in their address but will keep them |
| people" and "smile." These are simply tactics that | | | | from receiving important emails from their superiors. |
| make you feel empowered but allow the people who | | | | Make sure to send this person emails frequently so |
| currently dominate society to continue to dominate. So | | | | that they don't notice a sudden stoppage of mail, ween |
| here is my tested and proven way to gain this sought | | | | them off email slowly. Or you could sign them up for |
| after power. | | | | lots of junk mail so they continue to have lots of new |
| Meetings in the corporate world are basically a series | | | | messages in their inbox, the messages just quit being |
| of very tricky mind games; to be successful in | | | | from people in the office. This will give you exclusive |
| business you must master these games and that | | | | access to knowledge and will give you power. |
| means having power. The corporate world today is | | | | Another form of power is legitimate authority and |
| merely a competition to see who can intellectually | | | | coercive power. This is when have a power over |
| dominate the most people. A lot of people will give you | | | | someone because of your title like manager or CEO. |
| stupid advice like "dress for success," don't listen to | | | | Coercive power means that you have the ability to |
| these people, they are trying to trick you to gain more | | | | apply negative forces on someone. Some would call |
| power for themselves. Your focus should not be on | | | | this fear mongering, instead think of it like fish |
| the clothes you wear but rather subtle things you can | | | | mongering but instead of selling something stinky like |
| do to impress the people you work for. If you have a | | | | fish you are selling what can be a very useful emotion |
| one on one meeting with your boss, the best thing you | | | | like fear. The best way to execute this is to start by |
| can do is arrive at his office before he does and sit at | | | | establishing a title that gives you power over your |
| his or her chair behind their desk. This does two things | | | | coworkers. Remember, power is not something that |
| for you: a) it shows your superiors that you aspire to | | | | can be appointed, power must be given by others |
| be just like them and have the ambition to get to | | | | around you otherwise it is nonexistent. The title must |
| where they are and b) getting to sit behind their desk | | | | sound official, I recommend something like |
| gives you the power and makes them feel awkward. | | | | Departmental Director in charge of Illness-Related |
| You should also bring coffee to the meeting. In today's | | | | Absence (hyphenated phrases are a must to gain the |
| world nothing signifies a hard worker better than a | | | | most power). Make sure to include this title in the |
| caffeine addiction. A good idea is to keep a Starbucks | | | | signature line of your emails. Send out a memo to your |
| cup under your desk and fill it up with the office coffee, | | | | coworkers announcing to the office your new title and |
| buying real Starbucks every time you have a meeting | | | | some of the changes you will be implementing. As for |
| will drive you into bankruptcy after about a weeks | | | | the changes, I recommend you threaten to begin |
| worth of meetings. This way you can show not only a | | | | investigations into employees use of sick days and |
| caffeine addiction but a shared taste with your boss | | | | announce that any employees caught abusing these |
| as well. 10 year old kids in Mexico drink coffee but only | | | | days will be subject to loss of 25% of their "sick day |
| successful business people have Starbucks every | | | | privileges". This gives you both coercive and legitimate |
| morning; really successful business people have | | | | authority over your coworkers. |
| Starbucks every morning, afternoon and occasionally | | | | Follow this guide and you will see your power at work |
| night. This once again proves my point of there being a | | | | increase ten-fold. I can't guarantee that you will win |
| direct correlation between success and caffeine. | | | | friends but I can promise that you will have power |
| People often say that "Knowledge is Power." This is | | | | over your coworkers and isn't that what America is all |
| true, one of the power resources within groups is the | | | | about. Remember, with great power comes great |
| control over information. In order to control the | | | | responsibility. Also, power corrupts and absolute power |
| information you must have exclusive access to the | | | | corrupts absolutely. Obviously, neither of these |
| information. This leaves you really only one choice, | | | | statements are true, just look at America. America is |
| periodically browse through your bosses files while he | | | | the most powerful nation in the world, are we |
| is at lunch, whenever he gets a new file that concerns | | | | responsible? Are we corrupt? Hmm, never mind. |